Stress Relief: Asking The Wrong Questions (Part 3)

by Doc Orman, M.D.


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In my first post this week, we looked at the role questions play in the amount of stress we experience.   In my second post, we looked at how asking the wrong  questions can significantly impair your ability to obtain lasting stress relief. 

Today, I’m going to introduce you to an excellent book titled: QBQ: The Question Behind The Question…What To Really Ask Yourself To Eliminate Blame, Complaining, And Procrastination (2001).  This is actually the first in a series of QBQ books written by John G. Miller, an organizational consultant and Founder of QBQ, Inc. (www.QBQ.com).  

Personal Accountability And Self-Empowerment 

According to John Miller, the major purpose of this short (115 pages) but powerful book it to identify questions that can empower us in life by focusing our attention on personal accountability.  He accomplishes this goal in two main ways: 

1.     By identifying questions that can lead us to greater achievements, accomplishments, and happiness in life;

2.     By identifying questions that he calls Incorrect Questions (IQs)—since nothing positive or productive usually comes from asking them. 

He goes on to say that IQs are questions that tend to pop into our minds first.  However, once we become aware of them, and recognize them as Incorrect Questions, we can choose to ask ourselves better questions instead. 

The Antidotes For Blame, Complaining, And Procrastination 

One of the great things about this little gem of a book is how the author shows that blame, complaining, and procrastination all come from asking the wrong types of questions.  But if we train ourselves to look beyond these initial questions—to look for Questions Behind The Questions (QBQs)—we can often get ourselves free of these very negative and limiting perspectives. 

Jim Miller is an organizational consultant, so much of his work had been directed at educating corporate leaders, managers, and other employees about the benefits of QBQs, and other personal accountability practices, to business success and also to creating a more positive corporate culture for all to work within.

But he also points out that the very same principles, and the very same questions, can enhance our lives outside of work as well. 

Focus, Questions, Stress, And Stress Relief 

[easyazon-image-link asin=”0399152334″ alt=”QBQ! The Question Behind the Question: Practicing Personal Accountability at Work and in Life” src=”http://ecx.images-amazon.com/images/I/5190dq8vX0L._SL160_.jpg” align=”left” width=”100″ height=”160″]I highly recommend that you read this book, as well as other books in this QBQ series.  Just click on the cover image in this post, and you’ll be taken to Amazon, where you can find out more about it and order it if you are interested. 

One reason why I personally like this book is because it ties together all the major themes I’ve been discussing in the blog for the past two weeks: 

  • How what we focus on (or don’t focus on) has much to do with the amount of stress we experience.
  • How the questions we ask ourselves (or don’t ask ourselves) help to direct our focus, and therefore also have much to do with how much stress we experience.
  • How asking the wrong types of questions puts our focus on the wrong things in life and thereby makes our lives more stressful.
  • How asking better, more self-empowering questions can help us to have many fewer problems (and stress) in our lives, and to also be much better positioned to solve our problems, should they tend to occur. 

I hope you’ve enjoyed this series of six related blog posts, and that you will continue to follow this blog for many months and years to come. 

P.S.  If you haven’t signed up yet for my monthly Stress Relief Insights Newsletter, please go to the form on this page to do so.  You’ll find many more interesting discussions about stress here, especially about the many hidden causes of stress that you may not be fully aware of.

 

Enter Your Name And Email Below To Get Instant Access To This Content-Packed, Eye-Opening, 24-page Report

 

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